Day 2: My Journey Towards Finding Inner Peace

Yesterday, I found that I was fidgeting quite a bit. I may have fidgeted on day 1, I just did not notice. I was fidgeting because my neck was beginning to feel stiff from sitting in one position for an extended period of time. That broke my rhythm just as I was beginning to get used deep breathing and stillness. I tried to focus a lot on deep breathing, relaxing the individual muscles of my body one by one, starting from my face, as I tend to clench my teeth generally and stick my tongue on the roof of my mouth. I also noticed that my shoulders did not necessarily relax, they were slumped more than relaxed. All these areas I plan to work on tomorrow. On day 1, I thought about gurgling babies and that made me feel warm and happy as I tried to let go. So yesterday, I tried thinking about a waterfall shaded by beautiful thick forests as that is a happy place for me. At that point, I began to feel more relaxed. I did not get that floating sensation today, will try again tomorrow. I am generally an anxious person, so I need this to work, to settle me and calm me down. I got my anxiety from my mum, she is a worrier. There is nothing lovely, or interesting about worrying and anxiety. Yoga helps, but meditation I hear, really sorts it out. I am yet to connect with my centre, and I am willing myself to be patient. One day at a time.

During my two meditation sessions so far, I really enjoyed the feeling of making time for myself first and foremost. I also enjoyed how I felt afterwards. I feel that I am improving and getting closer to my quest with every new meditation experience, especially with the information available to me. While meditating yesterday, I wondered how to find my centre and what the centre actually is. Looking at the Meditation Insight video, I feel that it is basically a focus point at the centre of one’s body, the focus that causes you to first, think about solely IT, and subsequently about NOTHING, emptying your mind. It seems really tough, sounds simple, but quite tough to actually achieve. I will start with focusing on a peace circle, an imaginary object in my centre. When I meditated on day 1 and yesterday, I rushed into it. I now understand that I should have prepared myself for it, created a nice space, found the ideal sitting position, and possibly placed a pillow under myself to keep my shoulders straight. I am thankful for this video I found, and will be ready for tomorrow. Three key areas of focus for me: creating a nice environment for meditating, preparing my body for meditating, and focusing on my centre.

I had a discussion about the concept of Peace in+ Peace out = Sustainable peace with someone, and he thought it was much too simplistic. Hey it is simplicity that gives you peace, we have become so complex and sophisticated, that’s why the world has a kazillion problems. I do agree though, that inner peace will not be enough to create peace in society and the world. For sustainable peace in the world, the right combination is certainly important. Peace in for me means finding inner peace for myself, becoming more accommodating, listening better, understanding the meaning of stillness and using my words wisely. It would mean being selfless and taking the 5 self discipline points seriously. That way, I am creating an environment for the people I connect with to thrive and find their peace. It will mean raising children in an environment where they would be a beacon and light to their community. It would mean being part of a community that encourages peace and its benefits within my workplace, neighbourhood and/or family and friends, and the list goes on. That influence and extension of my inner peace, is what I regard as peace out and what could potentially bring about sustainable peace, if there are millions of people looking towards this same goal. A tree cannot make a forest, but we can start by planting those trees, one at a time.


  1. moi

    Do you have to sit? could you not lay on the bed and relax that way, then you would not have to worry about any aching, even if you just started that way to ease yourself into it.

  2. Carrie Rubin

    That would be my worry–that my back and neck would scream in protest. Certainly not conducive to finding peace! I’d have to find a really comfy position before I could try any meditation. I find lying on my back in yoga’s corpse pose is a relaxing position. Maybe I’d go for that.

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